Treat Tree

This would make the perfect centerpiece for a Halloween party or an alternative to the unattended candy bowl outside your front door. For even more creativity use your old plastic Christmas tree to hang the ghost.


You will need:

Tissue or coffee filters

White string

Black yarn or pipe cleaners

Black marker

Step one: For the head of the ghosts fill the center of a tissue square or coffee filter with a another piece of balled up tissue or coffee filter.

Step two: Tie off the head with the black yarn or pipe cleaner and fluff out the bottom.

Step three: Color eyes for the ghost on the head. You can color a mouth too as an option.

Step four: Tie a piece of string around the neck to hang it from your tree. If you are making this into a Treat Tree then you will need to fill the ghosts with candy instead.

How To Make Halloween Ghosts

This is a great project to do with your children for Halloween or Dia De Los Muertos. I calls for their creativity and costs you nothing.

You will need:

1 gallon milk jugs, one for every ghost

A black Sharpie, black acrylic paint, or black construction paper

White acrylic paint (optional)

A razor, sharp knife, or Exacto knife

Tea light candles or a string of Halloween or Christmas Lights

Step one: Wash out all of the jugs including the lids and allow to dry upside down.

Step two: On the side without the label paint or draw your ghost faces. You may also use construction paper for your smaller children to give them more scissor practice. Glue the face pieces to the jug. Make skeleton faces for Dia de los Muertos.

Step three: You have three options for the top. You can remove the top, paint it black or white, or use your Sharpie to make it black.

Step four: Carve the back of the jug out using the label as a guide.

Step five: Place your tiny candle inside or line your ghosts in front of the Christmas lights, stuffing a few of the bulbs inside. Enjoy an alternative to the messy, rotting pumpkin!

10 More Things You're Wasting Your Money On

1. New Shampoos

You know the ones I am talking about. They claim to be "new and improved" or "specially formulated for your hair type." But quite frankly, it's all a lie. The only new thing about these new shampoos is the bottle and the marketing. For dry, curly, or thick shampoos they add more or less conditioner than they already had before. For fine or straight hair they add less. That's all.

2. Checks

These dinosaurs of the paper payment world still exist. Most of us only use them to pay the rent and other bills that don't take debit. So why in the world are you paying extra for them? I know what you're thinking, "But the Hello Kitty ones are sooo cute." Reality check (pun intended), no one cares what your check looks like so long as the funds clear.

3. Laundry boosters

If your $20 detergent works so well, then why does it need a booster? Either use a better stain remover spray, baking soda, or change detergents.

4. Dryer Sheets

If your detergent isn't leaving your laundry fresh, change detergents. Is the static cling in your laundry so grand that you need dryer sheets?

5. Garlic bread and croutons

Make it yourself. It takes less time. It's cheaper and it tastes better.

6. Pasta Sauce

See number 5

7. Stretch mark cream

Switch to cocoa butter lotion. You will have smoother, healthier skin with less blemishes. One bottle, one price.

8. Octane booster

Your hubby tells you to put it your car with the next gas refill. Honestly, have you ever noticed a difference? Neither has the mechanic that is taking your money.

9. Car washes

That's what your children are for. They love getting wet on hot days and they love playing with bubbly soap. Grab a glass of wine and watch them go bonkers in your driveway.

10. Beauty parlor

Why are you paying someone else to flat iron your hair when you can do it yourself? Use a straightening serum before and a ceramic iron after.

10 Things You'll Waste Your Money On This Fall

1. Halloween Costumes

We're all guilty of it. We spend our hard earned dollars on the newest and coolest costume that will only be worn once. The reality is, the best costumes are the homemade ones or the ones that no one else thought about. Buy a used costume and sell it next year to make your money back.

2. Halloween Candy

Let's face reality. The only reason to buy the name brand candy is to prevent being made fun of by the little kiddies. If you've been scoping out the candy isles you are probably wincing at the prices. Try the local dollar store. They often have name brand candy for less. Visit a different dollar store each time. Different stores have different items.

3. Turkey

Why anyone would buy a turkey when they will get one free is beyond me. Then there are those who purchase a whole turkey when they know in advance that all they want is the breast or the dark meat. Save money by doing your regular grocery shopping at a store with a free turkey campaign. If you get more than one, donate the extra. Otherwise, buy only the turkey breast or the legs. There will be no pesky leftovers that no one wants to eat anymore.

4. Decorations

Every year you buy decorations for Halloween and Thanksgiving. The cheaper thing to do is to keep this year's decorations to use next year. We all love the fun of carving a pumpkin. Give your kids something else to do and buy a ceramic pumpkin. It is reusable. If your little ones really want the pumpkins at least use the pulp and the seeds for your recipes.

5. School Photos

You see your little dimple darling all dolled up and you can't resist purchasing the largest package available. Buy the smallest available and scan them onto your computer. Crop out any company names or logos. Order reprints to an online only photo company or print them on your computer. Online only photo companies don't care if your portraits are professional or not. Another way to save is to avoid school picture day altogether and take your little one to Walmart or JCPenney and buy a package. You will have better value for your money and you will have more control over the outcome of your portraits.

6. School Clothes

Most summer clothes can be worn far into the fall. The only thing you need to do is add layers for those days that are extra breezy or even wet. Most areas in the United States experience summer a month or two into fall. That accounts for most of the season. Let your child wear those t-shirts, denim and dresses for a little while longer. Add hoodies, long sleeve shirts, and tights on cold days. Save your money for winter.

7. School Supplies

Your little ones are playing you for a fool. They tell you that they need new pencils, notebooks, and even a backpack. You believe every word. What's a mother to do? Tell your child, the backpack he wears this year will be his backpack next year. See if that backpack isn't in pristine condition next June. Don't buy cartoon or movie themed backpacks or supplies. When the trend dies, so will their desire to use the supplies. Pencils and pencil boxes don't disintegrate the moment school is out. Check your supplies before you buy.

8. Heat

Don't turn up the heat for a little chill. Wear a blanket or a sweater and save the heat for winter.

9. Make-up

Most women want to throw away their summer colors and run to the mall for the new fall colors. The fact is that by adding darker colors to the summer palette will suffice. Blend dark brown to blue, green, purple, black, silver, orange, or yellow and you will have a fall version of a summer color. Use a darker lip liner and blend with the brighter colors and you will have a darker color. Ditch the lip gloss and you will have a matte lip stain which is common for fall. Mix your blush with face powder if you are medium or dark skinned and you will have a darker blush.

10. Sneakers / Tennis Shoes

Foot Locker and Foot Action all have to 2 for sales this time of year. The new Jordan's will come out and your son will darn near have a conniption. The only people who should buy new sneaks for the fall are the people who know how to keep them clean and people who's feet are done growing. Once the rain and snow start to fall, the sneaks will retire to the closet until Spring at which point a new style will be out. You'll be lucky if your son still fits them. Just wait until spring and save your time and money.

What's Wrong With Bleach?

I'm frequently asked why none of my cleaning recipes include bleach as an ingredient. There are a many reasons why I don't use or endorse bleach. I am not alone. Most hospitals in America no longer use bleach to clean. Instead, they use germicides. It kills the germs with irritating the patients. Here are my reasons for not using bleach.

1. Sensitive skin- I have never actually been sensitive to bleach. I am allergic to latex. Using bleach usually means wearing cleaning gloves which are made of latex. When my child was about 6 to 8 months old and wore nothing more than a onesie, he often entertained me by using his tiny little hands to scratch his chest. After about a month I began to realize it wasn't the detergent that was irritating his skin and giving him a mild case of eczema but rather it was the bleach. Bleach can not only irritate the skin but also it can cause new skin problems.

2. Fumes - The fumes from bleach can cause you to temporarily lose your sense of smell and even your sense of sight if you measure it improperly.

3. Chemical reactions- Most of the cleaning recipes I share are made with something that can actually cause a dangerous chemical reaction if it comes in contact with bleach. Ammonia and bleach makes mustard gas and you don't want that in your home. I like to save housewives money by encouraging them to make their own cleaning supplies. Switching from bleach based products like Clorox Bathroom Cleaner to Ammonia based products like Windex can cause a serious reaction in your home. It's best to eliminate bleach all together.

4. It's not a stain remover- Bleach uses chlorine to disinfect by chemically killing the germs and bacteria. It does not however cause those dead germs to be removed. Instead, it changes the color of the stain to make it appear to be gone. Take an old white t-shirt that has always been washed with bleach and hold it up in natural sunlight. You will see "ghost stains". The shirt may be clean but the stains were just whitened. Pour bleach in a toilet and you will see the stains "whiten" before your eyes. Pour some ACT pre-brush mouthwash into the toilet and you will see the waste is still there.

5. It's expensive- One bottle of bleach costs more than a bottle of ammonia, vinegar, a box of baking soda, and a bottle of peroxide. All of these chemicals are used for house cleaning.

6. It's not green- Bleach is more harmful to the environment than other bleaching agents.

7. It ruins- Bleach breaks down the fibers in fabrics over time. This is the reason for holes in your white shirts and socks.

The better alternative to bleach is Hydrogen peroxide when it comes to spot treatments. It doesn't ruin your fabrics. It actually breaks the bond of the germs and bacteria and stains causing them to be removed as the peroxide evaporates. It's safer for the environment, won't irritate your skin and is cheaper.

Another alternative is baking soda. It oxidizes the stain and causes it to release from the surface it clings to. This is why baking soda is a great alternative to toothpaste when you are in a pinch. Vinegar is an enzyme cleaner that works like baking soda. Use vinegar to remove blood rather than bleach so that the enzymes are killed and removed. Mature women everywhere know why this is important.

Check my post archives for non-bleach alternatives.

Ask Red Cooking Edition

Dear Red,

I tried making my own mayonnaise like Dale on Top Chef during one of the challenges and I would end up with a bowl of egg soup. What did I do wrong?

Whipped
Virginia


Dear Whipped,

The first trick to making mayonnaise from scratch is to use a warm bowl. The second is to add the oil very slowly. The third is to beat the eggs quickly. If you are doing this by hand then you will need to go at a speed of 2 beats per second. The eggs have to absorb the oil. Cooking shows don't show everything because they don't have time and the have a storyline to follow. The episode of Top Chef you saw was about speed. It would have slowed down the flow of the show to see the extra steps it takes to make mayonnaise.


Dear Red,

Love you, love your blog. I was wondering what is the difference between brown eggs and white eggs?

Charlotte
Venice Beach


Dear Charlotte,

In short, the difference is color, bird, price, and diet. White hens lay white eggs and red hens lay brown eggs. Red hens eat more than the white hens. Since the cost of production is higher, that cost is passed on to the consumer. The only way to taste the difference between the eggs is to raise the hens yourself. The diet directly influences the taste of the eggs, the way that organic gardening makes produce taste better than pesticide protected produce. As a housewife, save the money and go with white.


Dear Red,

No matter how many times I try, my fried chicken is always pink in the middle and my BBQ ribs are never fully done. What am I doing wrong? This is really irritating.

Sara
Houston


Dear Sara,

I would need more information to know exactly what was going on. My first guess is the cooking side. Always start with the fat side closest to the heat. Fat is an insulator. You need that fat to heat up at a higher temperature so that it may render or drip away from the food. On the grill, cut slits on the back of your ribs to allow the fat to drip down over the coals. Cook this side first. The heat will get to the meat faster and cook it evenly. When you fry chicken start with the skin side down. Control your heat to prevent burning.

Dear Red,

My kabobs keep burning! I'm sure it's something simple but I can't figure it out. I made one with steak, red onion, and bell peppers. I made another one with with chicken. I use a charcoal grill because I can't stand gas. Is this the problem because I don't want to switch to gas grilling.

Beverly
Merced


Dear Beverly,

You're right, you're problem is simple. First test the heat of your grill. You don't need high heat for a kabob. You need medium to low heat. Hold your hand 6 inches over the grill. If you can hold your hand there for 3 seconds your grill is ready. If you can hold it there for 5 seconds you are at medium heat and longer than that is low. When you layer your coals, leave the outermost edges of the grill without coals. If your food begins to burn or cook too fast you can place it there to cool for a second. Inside that area place a single layer of coals for things that don't need as much heat and save the middle of your grill for a double layer of coals. The second thing to do is to brush your kabobs with oil to help them cook evenly. Oil isn't meant to prevent burning. Olive oil burns easily and quickly. Canola and vegetable oil take longer to burn. Use canola or vegetable oil on your kabobs. Third, use your vents. If your grill is too small to organize the coals the way I described, use your vents to control the heat. Closing the vents brings the temperature down by suffocating the fire. Opening them gives the fire air to breathe and keeps the temperature up. I hope that helps!


Have a question for Red? Contact her at TheRedHousewife@yahoo.com

In Holy Matrimony (July Posting)

‘Tis the season for wedded bliss. Brides everywhere are dieting and color coordinating so that they will have the perfect wedding. If you are one of the stressed out brides who is finding she is turning into a “bridezilla” or a “pouty princess”, here are some things to consider to help take the edge off.

What’s the point?

Always remember the point of the wedding. The point of the wedding is to become one with the love of your life. This is the person that you plan to spend the rest of your life with. He will be the guardian of your heart whether or not the flowers were properly rotated six degrees to the left. No limousine ride or dove release will make the love that the two of you share any richer. If you believe your day will be ruined by something other than the groom not showing up, you seriously need to reorganize your priorities and way of thinking.

It’s not all about you.

Let’s face it. You aren’t going to marry yourself. The only reason you have been blessed with the title of “bride-to-be” is because someone chose you to be his lawfully wedded wife. Don’t take this day to completely ignore him. This is as much his day as it is yours. Change your phrasing from “my day” to “our day. If you choose the chapel, let him choose the honeymoon hotel. If you choose the color let him choose the colors. Share and compromise now. If you can’t do that without conflict, your road to happily ever after will likely be short lived. This is one day in the rest of your lives together. Don’t let it define your entire relationship.

Your family and friends are not your servants.

With all of the stress that brides subject themselves to, they are left with no other choice but to defer some of that burden to their loyal and faithful servants. Even the nicest of brides will undoubtedly order her mother or sister to run a list of errands for her wedding day. It is a reasonable request for a nervous bride to ask the people she trusts most to handle the deeds that cannot be mishandled. It is not reasonable to shout at them and to ask them to do things that you can do yourself.

The thing to remember most about a wedding is that it is a day of celebrating the union between two people in love. Do your best not to tarnish something so naturally wonderful with salty behavior, wasteful spending and cruel treatment of the very people you will call on after your wedding day for advice.

The Red Housewife has spoken and will henceforth forever hold her peace.