Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Spring Cleaning Phase One: The Purge

It's that time of year when we free ourselves of trash and clutter. Before you venture into that closet or the garage, start with your friends. This year I will be doing the purge. No one needs friends who aren't pulling their weight. You certainly don't need false acquaintances. 

Free your gigabytes

Send out individual text messages to everyone in your contacts list. If you don't receive a response in an hour, delete the contact. You may choose to be more flexible in your response time limit. But if the person isn't responding, you're not friends. You may also have the wrong number. But if you don't have their new number, again, you're not friends. 

Privatize your social media

You have all the friends you need on Facebook. In fact, you probably have too many. Post a message on Facebook informing your friends of the purge. Then, by the end of the day, wipe out anyone who has not spoken to you in the last 6 months. You don't need looky-loos or passengers on your plane. You certainly don't need thirsty potentials stalking you either. After you purge your page, change your privacy settings to disallow any further friend requests. 

Reel in the line

Don't be so open to make new friends. This means, every person that shares common interests does not deserve to be referred to as a friend. Some people need to stay on that "acquaintance" status. Limit your friends to those who expressly wish you well, support you when you're on the right track, defend you when you're under attack, show concern when you're hurt, and inspire greatness. 

You will hurt some people's feelings. You will piss people off. But this is about reducing access to your positive life force. This is less about building walls and isolation and more about building a stronger you. People will take whatever they can grab from you. Including your light. Purge the negative and make room for the positive. 

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Why Ignoring People Never Works

Someone did or said something that pissed you off. You don't want to say something you can't take back so you stop talking to them. They keep talking to you but you refuse to acknowledge them. Some time later you bring up why you're still mad and they look at you like you're speaking Swahili. Now you're angrier and ignore them even harder. Sound familiar?

Ignoring people is a passive aggressive way to manipulate a person. You want someone to start or stop doing something but they deny your request. Ignoring the person is supposed to use their desire to interact with you as a bargaining chip to get what you want. But it doesn't work. Here's why. 

They never really liked you

You can't use someone's desire to interact with you as a bargaining chip when they already don't give two shits about you. In fact, whatever they're doing or not doing to piss you off might have been intentional to begin with. Which means they have successfully manipulated you, but you're mad by yourself. 

They have no idea that you're mad

Most people get mad then immediately ignore. This means the person you're mad at has no idea. If they don't know you're mad, they don't know what they did wrong and therefore won't care. This leaves you bitter, ignoring someone who hasn't figured that out yet. 

They don't care that you're mad

Don't be so quick to assume they are the problem rather than you. You might be a very petty person who simply cannot handle the truth. Why would they care that you're mad?

You're preventing progress

How can a person right a wrong if you're not allowing them the opportunity to correct their mistake? If you don't want them to make it right, then why play this game?

Better solution

If someone makes you mad, tell them. Ignoring them is okay if you need time to pull yourself together. But don't let more than a week pass before you communicate your feelings. Too much time breeds indifference. 

Give that person a chance to make things right. Allow them to apologize. Allow them access to you to speak with you and work it out. 

Don't play games. If you don't want to let them correct their mistake, tell them. The dumbest pettiest thing you can do is stay friends with someone on Facebook with whom you no longer wish to speak. You'll make yourself look ridiculous to the person you're ignoring, as well as your other friends and family. Being unreasonable and illogical makes you look unstable. 

Get over it and let it go, work it out if you can, or end the relationship and move on. 

Saturday, February 7, 2015

Mardi Gras King Cake Recipe

"Epiphany, celebrated in European countries, marks the coming of the wise men who brought gifts to the Christ Child. Epiphany is also called Little Christmas on the Twelfth Night, and is celebrated twelve nights after Christmas. People from all of the world celebrate Epiphany by exchanging gifts and feasting. A very popular custom that is still celebrated is the making of the “King’s Cake” which represents the three kings who brought gifts. A plastic baby is baked inside the King Cake, and the tradition is whoever receives the baby in their piece of cake must buy the next King Cake or throw the next party. King Cakes are made of a cinnamon filled dough in the shape of a hollow circle. The cake is topped with a delicious glazed topping and then sprinkled with colored sugar. The three colors of the sugar are Purple (representing Justice), Green (representing Faith) and Gold (representing Power). Today the King Cakes are baked with a wide assortment of fillings inside the cake. King Cake is the preferred dessert and snack in New Orleans during Mardi Gras. Hundreds of thousands of King Cakes are eaten in New Orleans during the Carnival season."

(The following recipe is completely non-organic)

Mardi Gras King Cake Recipe

TOTAL TIME: Prep: 40 min. + rising Bake: 20 min. + cooling

YIELD: 24 servings (2 cakes)


  • 1 package (1/4 ounce) active dry yeast
  • 1/2 cup warm water (110° to 115°)
  • 1/2 cup warm milk (110° to 115°)
  • 1/3 cup shortening
  • 1/3 cup sugar
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1 egg
  • 4 to 4-1/2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 2 cans (12-1/2 ounces each) almond cake and pastry filling
  • GLAZE:
  • 3 cups confectioners' sugar
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 3 to 4 tablespoons water
  • Purple, green and gold colored sugar


  • 1. In a large bowl, dissolve yeast in warm water. Add the milk, shortening, sugar, salt, egg and 2 cups flour. Beat on medium speed for 3 minutes. Beat until smooth. Stir in enough remaining flour to form a soft dough (dough will be sticky).
  • 2. Turn onto a floured surface; knead until smooth and elastic, about 6-8 minutes. Place in a greased bowl, turning once to grease top. Cover and let rise in a warm place until doubled, about 1 hour.
  • 3. Punch dough down. Turn onto a lightly floured surface; divide in half. Roll one portion into a 16-in. x 10-in. rectangle. Spread almond filling to within 1/2 in. of edges. Roll up jelly-roll style, starting with a long side; pinch seam to seal. Place seam side down on a greased baking sheet; pinch ends together to form a ring. Repeat with remaining dough and filling. Cover and let rise until doubled, about 1 hour.
  • 4. Bake at 375° for 20-25 minutes or until golden brown. Cool on a wire rack. For glaze, combine the confectioners' sugar, vanilla and enough water to achieve desired consistency. Spread over cooled cakes. Sprinkle with colored sugars. Push the plastic baby into the cake from the bottom. WARN YOUR GUESTS that there is one inside. Yield: 2 cakes (12 servings each).

Nutritional Facts

If you have to ask, you shouldn't be eating it.